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Saturday, 30 July 2016

The various purposes of desire.

A week on from all that cooking.
Lucky me,all those lovely things to eat and minimal work to get them to the table.

Smell a rat?
I bet you do.

Have you never found that looking at the recipe/having the idea , doing the shopping and then cooking it is enough?
 Its a bit like someone telling you that you will find a joke hilarious or a man telling you that he is sexy.

Christmas day food is a good example.
In advance make mincemeat ,bread sauce,stuffing,mince pies,sausage rolls,chocolate log,Christmas pudding,Christmas cake,potted shrimps,spiced beef.....

You: "Oh shut up,shut up, shut up."
Me: "Feel weary?" "Queasy?" "Think its a bit excessive and / or show off?"
You: "No offense but YES."
Me: "and thats before we get to the big day."

Ok,we ate a bit of everything but mostly the batch of cooking just sat there.
There wasn't room for the rhubarb and strawberry pie in the fridge.I checked on it and the heat had put a mould on it.I very nearly did a dance.

Waste? Hardly bad girl territory is it?
It's a form of wanting to want something

A place, for instance, that you have loved down the years and know like the back of your hand. Isn't it better to lie in bed and mentally walk round it,savouring all the old pleasures? If you go it can be either formulaic or disappointing or both.

Is there a place you went to, thought magical and then never went back to?

Don't know why - Nora Jones
(video on Utube if you don't know it)

"I waited till I saw the sun
I don't know why I didn't come
I left you by the house of fun
I don't know why I didn't come......."

"Something has to make you run
 I don't know why I didn't come
I feel as empty as a drum
I don't know why I didn't come......."

Mind you I never felt like this about romance.Said a mouthful there Angela! Before I married the saxophonist I had six other proposals of marriage.NO,I wasn't the town tramp as they say in the states.I just found friendships with  men easy, men who turned out to be romantic.
No, I did not want to want any of them .Just said no and got out quick.

Perhaps wanting to want things is a dangerous game whether its half a chicken or anything else.


  1. I get this! I tried that "once a month cooking" years ago and I hated it.

    Do you have a deep freeze?

    1. Yes I have a deep freeze but I also have (for various reasons) access to a "trade only " wholesale warehouse.They have a bargain section which means wholesale and then a reduction on that.
      You can see where this is going can't you?
      Half a side of top quality beef for next to nothing etc,etc = no freezer space .And that's not to mention the box of french butter (same source),the fish from the coast and what pheasants/partridges/rabbits the poacher leaves in my shed.
      All good until the Saxophonist has to do the regular puzzle of what I could not turn down and he has to fit into the freezer!

  2. I often want not to want things.

    1. Oh Mr Hedges - or shall I call you Warwick?

  3. I know I've wanted things. But can't recall ever wanting to want things. Maybe I have all I need? Shame about the rhubarb and strawberry pie.

    1. I know what I want now!
      Your household near to mine.
      Martin:"wife is out for the day and I've got the grandchildren".
      Angela:"Excellent,take these savoury flans off my hands and buy me a pint next time I see you in the "Fox and Gynaecologist".

  4. I think I do understand what you have written about here.

    Desire and enthusiasm sometimes travel along together, but sometimes take different forks in that road. Demand and supply rarely really match.

    Although I received and declined three or perhaps four proposals, I never married. Someone broke my heart. Long ago. I sometimes wonder at how different my life is now. It's a happy life, just different.

    I am also sorry about that pie. Best wishes.

    1. Oh Frances, you sound so wistful.
      I will not intrude and ask what happened with the "someone" and your heart but I am glad that you are happy.XX

  5. Desire can be a dangerous thing...and a complex combination of ecstatic fantasy and disappointing reality.
    I've never married. I've had scores of relationships but have always been terrified of genuine commitment. All the people who I truly loved are now dead.

    Sorry about the strawberry rhubarb pie. I can't keep anything unrefrigerated because of the heat. I usually freeze my bread.


  6. You do not want to get down to fantasising about pies and no more than that !
    Unfreeze your bread,so to speak.....